Life is tough, so get a helmet.

rendigo:

cat-wings:

buddha-has-a-boner:

themusicgetsyouhigh:

theoneandonlysince91:

are these real? bc I’m going to buy them all…

Winona is FULL of beautiful houses like this…. And I really hope I get to own one some day

They all look like Murder House to me.

*cries for the rest of my life*

i wanna live in a murder house………….

(Source: bardot-barbiturate, via breannsus-canadensis)

hellabrave:

Today is George Weasley’s 36th birthday. Born 1st April 1978, every year since he lost his brother, this special day just hasn’t been the same. And that, my friends, is what you call the cruelest April Fool’s joke of all time. 

hellabrave:

Today is George Weasley’s 36th birthday. Born 1st April 1978, every year since he lost his brother, this special day just hasn’t been the same. And that, my friends, is what you call the cruelest April Fool’s joke of all time. 

(Source: wreckage, via potterheadcanon)

greenchestnuts:

slussy:

Frankenstein enters into a body building competition and finds he has seriously misunderstood the objective

the best part is that it uses frankenstein correctly

(via steezy-brah)

me:

but it's 2 AM

stomach:

did i fucking stutter

ohhenryd:

thatpunnyguy:

snazziest:

They call me coffee cuz I grind so fine

They call me coffee I keep you up past 2 am

They call me coffee because I’m really bitter and most people don’t like me without changing some aspect of what I am

(via youshouldtiemeup)

halalbacon:

The human brain is an amazing organ. It functions 24 hours a day from the day we are born and only stops when we are taking an exam or fall in love.

(via steezy-brah)

When will it be my turn to be touched?
My friends are all giggling groups of
how are they in bed
I can’t go a day without an orgasm
and how did I ever live without sex?

Is it true, either you use it or you lose it?
Would my back still arch if my legs
were parted?
The unpathed territories that you
used to map with your tongue
have grass grown over them,
long abandoned.

They tell me to not be so picky,
to crowd into dark bars
and take home the drunkest boy.
They tell me,
quit pushing off the ones who grab your face.
Let them shove themselves down your throat.

But my body cries,
I don’t want to be pried at,
muddied,
fighting sleep during sex.
I want to be touched.

—   I Want To Be Touched | Lora Mathis (via lora-mathis)

(via melomania)

pizza:

fishingboatproceeds:

pizza:

did u guys see me at the oscars

You looked great, pizza. Congrats on everything. I love you.

Thanks, John. I love you too.

(via takeachanceandstaystrong)

donutguts:

gr8eva:

my self esteem has two levels

  1. im a worthless piece of shit who deserves no love
  2. bow down before me bitches i am your queen

this is accurate

(Source: officialmrpresident, via takeachanceandstaystrong)

herocom89:

duckmancain:

builttobulk:

modernmatthew:

If you don’t know who Carl Akeley was, here’s your chance to learn about one of the biggest badasses in US History.  I mean, he was BFF with Teddy Roosevelt, so you can imagine he knows how to throw down.  Speaking of which…
After a long day of hunting and observing wildlife in Somalia, Carl Akeley was headed back to camp, where he’d bagged a hyena and warthog earlier in the day.  When he got there all he saw was a couple of big bloody streaks leading off into a thick brush.  Akeley froze, realizing what was happening, just as an enormous leopard leaped towards him teeth-first.  Unable to get his weapon back around quickly enough, Akeley dropped his gun and threw his arm up just in time to prevent the vicious beast from ripping out his throat. The leopard latched on to Akeley’s left hand, chomping down with all its might.  When his attempts to pull his hand out of the leopards’ jaws only made the creature bite down harder, Akeley, locked in a life or death fistfight with one of the most perfect predators nature ever created, did one of the most insane things ever – he punched his fist further into the leopard’s mouth. Yes, you are reading that correctly. Carl Akeley, noted philanthropist and respected wildlife conservationist, punched a fucking leopard in the esophagus from the inside. The leopard gagged, Akeley pulled his hand out, and then he took the thing, bodyslammed it to the ground, and jumped on it with both knees, crushing it to death. Then Akeley, bleeding profusely from horrific wounds on both hands, clawed to shit, still recovering from a recent battle with malaria, and barely able to stand, picked up the leopard (despite a shattered hand), threw it over his shoulder, walked back to camp with it, and turned it into taxidermy for a museum exhibit.
THE END.

wHY DID I NEVER LEARN ABOUT THIS MAN IN SCHOOL

LIFE GOALS

ROLE MODEL

herocom89:

duckmancain:

builttobulk:

modernmatthew:

If you don’t know who Carl Akeley was, here’s your chance to learn about one of the biggest badasses in US History.  I mean, he was BFF with Teddy Roosevelt, so you can imagine he knows how to throw down.  Speaking of which…

After a long day of hunting and observing wildlife in Somalia, Carl Akeley was headed back to camp, where he’d bagged a hyena and warthog earlier in the day.  When he got there all he saw was a couple of big bloody streaks leading off into a thick brush.  Akeley froze, realizing what was happening, just as an enormous leopard leaped towards him teeth-first.  Unable to get his weapon back around quickly enough, Akeley dropped his gun and threw his arm up just in time to prevent the vicious beast from ripping out his throat. The leopard latched on to Akeley’s left hand, chomping down with all its might.  When his attempts to pull his hand out of the leopards’ jaws only made the creature bite down harder, Akeley, locked in a life or death fistfight with one of the most perfect predators nature ever created, did one of the most insane things ever – he punched his fist further into the leopard’s mouth. Yes, you are reading that correctly. Carl Akeley, noted philanthropist and respected wildlife conservationist, punched a fucking leopard in the esophagus from the inside. The leopard gagged, Akeley pulled his hand out, and then he took the thing, bodyslammed it to the ground, and jumped on it with both knees, crushing it to death. Then Akeley, bleeding profusely from horrific wounds on both hands, clawed to shit, still recovering from a recent battle with malaria, and barely able to stand, picked up the leopard (despite a shattered hand), threw it over his shoulder, walked back to camp with it, and turned it into taxidermy for a museum exhibit.

THE END.

wHY DID I NEVER LEARN ABOUT THIS MAN IN SCHOOL

LIFE GOALS

ROLE MODEL

(via someclevershit)

wolfie-mcwolferton:

raideo:

locked-in-the-storage-closet:

zlandael:

'conventions are for no-lives and losers'

more in video (x)

i lost it at home depot 

i really need a comic of someone asking pyramid for assistance in home depot

"Hi, I would like some help cutting this wood to size. Is there someone for that?" *a loud scraping noise is heard rhythmically coming nearer and nearer* "Yes we do, sounds like he’s on his way hear. You’ll love him, he’s very polite and incredibly skilled."

(via someclevershit)

DC Covergirls by Stanley Lau

(Source: queen-mera, via someclevershit)

What use is falling apart? It’s not gonna get me anywhere. It’s best to just soldier on, let life carry me to a better place.

lillyhasatumblr:

spacelionsgetscared:

oh fuck every time i see it i laugh so fucking hard. i have to reblog this every time. i can’t not reblog this
lOOK AT THE GUY IN THE BACKGROUND HE’S LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF

He looks at his hand like it’s the first time he’s ever seen it.

lillyhasatumblr:

spacelionsgetscared:

oh fuck every time i see it i laugh so fucking hard. i have to reblog this every time. i can’t not reblog this

lOOK AT THE GUY IN THE BACKGROUND HE’S LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF

He looks at his hand like it’s the first time he’s ever seen it.

(Source: ForGIFs.com, via someclevershit)